something happened... [halfway done]

i've "popped." as in, my tummy suddenly became HUGE. huge. see it? i woke up one day, looked down, and thought "THAT'S not going to go away, is it?" here we go.

hello, 18 weeks, what's up? oh, i look like i'm having a baby now? that IS good news. let's go by some stinkin maternity pants.

besides only being able to wear one pair of pants to work all week, i have no complaints. this pregnancy has been very, very mild thus far. i've had almost no weird or uncomfortable symptoms and i STILL don't feel any different, except for when i do in which case i usually feel better. example: i'm not quite sleeping how i was before i was pregnant, i'm sleeping better than i ever remember sleeping, ever. the only negative symptoms i've had are outrageous headaches and i actually think we're past the worst of those. yay! oh, and i'm blaming my regular acnes woes on being pregnant now. cause i can.

man, i need to start reading some books or something. i don't plan on any child birth classes but i'm starting to get nervous and i'm losing my "pft, i got this" attitude a little bit... i should at least read past page 30 of "what to expect when expecting," right? there's got to be something in there i don't already know [everything]. i should also probably pick up a book about natural child birth and figure out how all of THAT is supposed to work. i feel like there has to be a way to pop out a baby without pain meds and still live, adam and eve sure didn't have any epidurals to puncture spinal cords with, right? i have a pretty high pain tolerance but that doesn't mean i think this is going to be loads of fun. i've felt contractions, they were excruciating. i'm sure it'll feel different in a more giving-birthy circumstance but i don't know if that means it'll feel not as painful or more painful. mostly i'm just pretending i'm super extra brave but i honestly want a pain medication free childbirth because i'm a chicken and the thought of that epidural in my spine makes me sick every single time i think about. more sick than the thought of somehow pushing the offspring of craig out of my flimsy little body, so we're going with that one. so, someone remind me to get a good natural childbirth book, i need to read about how capable i am and how it's totally possible to get this baybay out of my uterus and into my arms.

wanna hear some good news? i can feel him. all the time. on sunday night as i was dosing off i felt him tumble and roll over or something in there, and then when we got off the space needle on monday he kicked me pretty good. and he hasn't stopped since. now i've felt him repeatably throughout the day for the past two day, all the time. he's having dance parties in there or something, it goes between the feeling of soft feathers moving up against me to rather forceful thumping, usually in my lower rightish area. we're going to have to have a talk about his raucous behavior before the neighbors start complaining. i can't wait until craig can feel him! right now i pretty much just go "eek!" all the time and make crazy excited faces and no one else gets why i'm so excited. it'll happen. he's getting huge. HUGE!

i'm no where NEAR ready, but i CAN'T WAIT to have this baby out here and snuggling me all the day long. we're halfway done already!! i can't even believe it, we're halfway done with this thing and we're still alive and mostly sane! and in about another 18 weeks we're going to have a baby, and then we'll always always have a baby and we won't be young, immature newlyweds anymore, we'll be ADULTS with CHILDREN! well, we'll probably still be a little immature...and young...and maybe i'm not an adult yet... heck. we have no idea how to be parents.

but we're so excited =]